Did you make any New Years resolutions this year? Going to drop 20 lbs, quit smoking, maybe look for a job you lazy bastard? Sometimes New Years resolutions work, and sometimes they don't.
Top Five Signs Your New Years Resolutions Aren't Working
#5. You want to quit smoking but the kid behind the register at the Butt Hutt is your only real friend.
#4. Once you stopped drinking, you realized just how boring your regular life is.
#3. No, looking one time at a pair of cute twins and thinking you wanted to date both of them does NOT make you a sex addict. Quit something else.
#2. You only got as far as "In 2012 I resolve to . . . " and then passed out drunk with a burning cigarette in one hand and a hooker in the other.
#1. Your resolution was to stop making New Years Resolutions.
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